#769: God’s Edmontosaurus

March 27th, 2017 § permalink

Years ago, I visited a creationist dinosaur dig.  » Read the rest of this entry «

#754: Presidential Quotes, Corrected

February 20th, 2017 § permalink

“When written in Chinese, the word ‘crisis’ is composed of two characters — one represents danger and one represents a weaving machine, or small chair.”

– John F. Kennedy, Remarks at the Convocation of the United Negro College Fund, April 12, 1959 » Read the rest of this entry «

#752: The Reporter, the Professor and Me

February 15th, 2017 § permalink

“It’s with a heavy heart,” the e-mail read, “that I tell you that my endeavor as a freelance journalist is in its final months.” » Read the rest of this entry «

#738: Your Plans for Wednesday

January 13th, 2017 § permalink

The stage is set.

I mean, it’s not a stage so much as a microphone at the back of an artsy-funky dive bar in Bucktown.

And the performers are readying.

I mean, they’re not professional performers with headshots and acting credits and feelings on “the theatre, darling” so much as men and women from the community who have stories to share.

And we’re going to take on the president-elect of the United States of America in the last few hours we get to say “-elect.” » Read the rest of this entry «

#725: Help Nonprofits Survive Trump – Venue and Date

December 14th, 2016 § permalink

At 7 p.m. Jan. 18, 2017 — 40 hours before a dangerous man ascends to the highest post in the nation — come to Gallery Cabaret at 2020 N. Oakley Ave. to drink some beer, hear some stories and raise some money for groups that are going to need it.

But before then, here’s how your words can help a few good groups survive the next four years. » Read the rest of this entry «

#724: The Only Story

December 12th, 2016 § permalink

I tell stories. A lot of them.

I tell stories of a city, or at least the North Side, I grumble to myself when not feeling up to task. I tell stories of people and places and that time an alderman bit off another alderman’s ear.

I’m working on a project that, if all goes to plan, could be the first to quote both U.S. Appeals Court Judge Abner Mivka and Nadwuar the Human Serviette.

But is it wrong that the only story I want to tell today is the snow? » Read the rest of this entry «

#710: Eight Thousand Fucks From Spider Jerusalem and My Own Thoughts on Donald Trump’s Election

November 9th, 2016 § permalink

“Your first deadline’s tomorrow. I want to see eight thousand words. Printable words. I still remember that essay you wrote when the Beast got elected. I do not want to see the word ‘fuck’ typed eight thousand times again.”

- Royce, issue #1, Transmetropolitan » Read the rest of this entry «

#709: Vote Like a Champ in Just Six Steps

November 7th, 2016 § permalink

Voting is like improv comedy: The fact you’re unprepared is only amusing to you.

For the rest of us, those who take more than one stab at existence and who tire of any activity with a cover and two-drink minimum to watch state school theater majors laugh harder at their own jokes than the audience ever will, we like to be a little more prepared.

So in the vein of my Bare Minimum Voting Guide from the primary, a six-step plan that will get you voting like a champ in no time. * » Read the rest of this entry «

#707: The Daily News

November 2nd, 2016 § permalink

It’s got sports on the back, a preview of Augustana College basketball’s new season.

That seems newspapery.

It’s got boring calendar items too, meeting dates for the Keep Moline Beautiful Commission and the Andalusia Township Library Board. That certainly seems like newspaper turf.

But does a newspaper purporting to print the news of Rock Island, Moline, East Moline and Milan print pieces on how Chicago Teachers Union President Karen Lewis was “refusing to honor the United States of America by standing during the national anthem.” Does the Quad Cities readership care about the seating situation of a woman who was diagnosed with cancer last year 181 miles away? » Read the rest of this entry «

#689: “Dhoom 3” vs. “City That Never Sleeps” – What’s the Daffiest Chicago Movie?

September 21st, 2016 § permalink

One year and 198 stories ago, I reviewed 1953’s “City That Never Sleeps,” a cinematic world of crooked cops, gangster magicians, the handyman from “Newhart” and a character named, I kid you not, Little Stubby.

It was the single silliest, most ridiculous and just plain most daffy Chicago-based movie I had ever seen.

Until Sunday. » Read the rest of this entry «

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