#828: Unread

August 11th, 2017 § permalink


Happy Birthday. I hope you have a good one. It’s nice you won’t have to work.

I hope you enjoy the book and remember your sister while your reading it. I love you. Enjoy your birthday.

Love your sis,


I put the spray-painted copper copy of “Clear and Present Danger” back on the shelf in the fake child’s room. It slid easily between similarly coppered copies of “A Monetary History of the United States 1867-1960” and a Tom Clancy’s “Without Remorse” that, based on a stamp on the title page, once belonged to a dentist from Santa Rosa, California. » Read the rest of this entry «

#709: Vote Like a Champ in Just Six Steps

November 7th, 2016 § permalink

Voting is like improv comedy: The fact you’re unprepared is only amusing to you.

For the rest of us, those who take more than one stab at existence and who tire of any activity with a cover and two-drink minimum to watch state school theater majors laugh harder at their own jokes than the audience ever will, we like to be a little more prepared.

So in the vein of my Bare Minimum Voting Guide from the primary, a six-step plan that will get you voting like a champ in no time. * » Read the rest of this entry «

#588: Rat of Astor

January 29th, 2016 § permalink

There’s a stretch of the Gold Coast where the homes are beautiful.

It’s not the most visible part, the tall condo buildings from that misguided period of American architecture known as the 1970s, when the point of a building was to crane above the others, out out out into a view you could brag about to your ground-dwelling coworkers.

Before the deluxe apartment in the sky was the ultimate in movin’ on up, luxury was low, squat and gorgeous. » Read the rest of this entry «

#536: 7 Days a Week

September 30th, 2015 § permalink

The Frisbee haunts me. » Read the rest of this entry «

#262: Peace to 2013

December 30th, 2013 § permalink

Peace to the old man sipping drinks at the VFW bar.

And the bagpiper on the condo roof.

Peace to the newsman, chasing stories for cartoons.

Peace to the lady who jammed in Tunisia.

And peace to the one who makes really sexy ladies’ underthings. » Read the rest of this entry «

#261: The Gold Coast Bagpipes

December 27th, 2013 § permalink

He was thin, mostly, with light brown hair in a blocky cut that would be called hipster if he weren’t doing it authentically.

“Nope,” the doorman said, narrowing his eyes and looking away from me. “Haven’t had any complaints about a bagpipe.” » Read the rest of this entry «

#240: The Drake’s Real Chicago

November 8th, 2013 § permalink

Real Chicago is a white woman in a white dress walking down a corridor lined with mirrors.

According to the ad on the hotel wall, at least. » Read the rest of this entry «

#10: Strip Club

May 21st, 2012 § permalink

All I remember is the heat and her dance. » Read the rest of this entry «

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