#572: Speed Dater X

December 23rd, 2015 § permalink

He sat down across from the woman with the impossibly dark hair. He smiled first, or maybe she did. Introductions, handshakes, more smiles and then he asked about the tattoo on her arm.

It was the name of her dead father, so to lighten the mood he asked a funny joke question.

“The question was, ‘Have you ever been arrested?’ And she said yes, so I instantly think — because I’m having fun and I’ve had a couple drinks — oh, it was probably like for underage drinking or something like that. I’m like, ‘Oh, for what?’ And she’s like, ‘Ahhhhh,’ I’m like ‘Were you convicted?’ And that’s when she launched into it.” » Read the rest of this entry «

#571: Nine Star Wars Spoilers

December 21st, 2015 § permalink

1. Han and Chewy save Lumpy, Itchy and Malla, but the real hero is comedy legend Art Carney.
2. The Sith’s darkest dark lord is Mel Brooks mainstay Harvey Korman.
3. “The Star Wars Holiday Special” (1978) was written in a truly dark era of sci fi, comedy and CBS programming. » Read the rest of this entry «

#570: The Ghost of Christmas

December 18th, 2015 § permalink

I just wrote something really funny and sharp and incisive. I trashed it.

It was about the biggest shopping day of the year coming tomorrow and it had smart stuff about Judean shepherds and people who point out pagan traditions and a bit on Julia Stiles, Vanilla Ice and Chef Rick Bayless that, in context, would have made you laugh.

But I deleted it, because this season, my wish is for something real. » Read the rest of this entry «

#569: The 1,001 Chicago Afternoons Holiday Gift Guide

December 16th, 2015 § permalink

Although Hanukkah is over, there is actually another gift-giving holiday in December.

Followers of the sect known as Christianity celebrate a special day called “Christ-mas” in which trees are slaughtered, cookies are left for fat, flying elvish deer-herders and Irishmen receive massive amounts of birds.

In case you want to purchase a gift for this regional folk festival, here are some ideas that will support a few of the people and organizations I’ve written about in the 150 stories that have appeared on this site so far in 2015. » Read the rest of this entry «

#568: The Chicago Guy

December 14th, 2015 § permalink

The Chicago guy remembers the neighborhoods as they were. There’s still a part of him that believes so-and-so is full of Poles, Irish, Jews, Hispanics or Greeks.

The Chicago guy tells stories of how things were 30, 40 years ago, expecting and getting interest from the details. How filthy Finkl Steel was when he made runs there in his truck driver days. How the houses never used to be condos.

The Chicago guy has strong opinions on Mayor Daley the First. Strong ones. » Read the rest of this entry «

#567: Geocaching Four Chicago Firsts

December 11th, 2015 § permalink

Geocaching is an amazingly odd little activity wherein people use GPS coordinates and clues to find treasures hidden around the world.

For those who don’t have a GPS and time to spare, here’s a little list of an article on four of the oddest things created in Chicago.

But if you have both, it’s a chance for you to hunt down four spots where Chicago changed the world. » Read the rest of this entry «

#566: The Gray of the Lions

December 9th, 2015 § permalink

The Art Institute of Chicago only exists because a woman’s legal rights didn’t. » Read the rest of this entry «

#565: White and White and Read All Over – The Troublesome Tribune Comics

December 7th, 2015 § permalink

The Chicago Tribune’s weekday comic section has 21 cartoons. Every single one is by a white person. » Read the rest of this entry «

#564: The Dojo, Part 2 – Release

December 4th, 2015 § permalink

The Dojo is the nickname. It’s an apartment, yes, but through the rotating tenants all involved in Chicago’s breaking, popping and hip-hop dance community, it has become an artist colony, a practice space, a hub of up-and-coming and established dancers promoting and supporting each other’s training.

Yeah, it’s sort of a dojo.

Last week, we heard the story of B-Boy ManOfGod, who recently moved from The Dojo to Hong Kong.

Today, here’s the story of Dojo resident Aaron Gray, AKA Release. » Read the rest of this entry «

#563: The Only Possible Explanation

December 2nd, 2015 § permalink

“Ankh Ahmet,” a voice said from the darkness.

Chris looked in the direction of the voice.

“Hello?” he said.

“Ankh Yupid,” the voice continued.

“Look, I don’t know what you guys are playing at, but the guy with the ears promised me-”

A blur of motion, a whish of red shroud, a glint of steel.

“Ahn Donderanblitzen,” the voice whispered in Chris’ ear as he felt the blade plunge into him. » Read the rest of this entry «

  • -30-