In the 1889 Democratic mayoral primary, former Mayor Carter Harrison Sr. was told to wait in the lobby. » Read the rest of this entry «
#711: Heaven ‘tween Grand and Washington
November 11th, 2016 § permalink
Smarter people than me can write your think pieces.
More emotive than me can write about tears.
Less stunned than me can write your rallies and revolution.
I can write right now about disbelief. And how lovely the downtown of Chicago, Illinois, is. » Read the rest of this entry «
#710: Eight Thousand Fucks From Spider Jerusalem and My Own Thoughts on Donald Trump’s Election
November 9th, 2016 § permalink
“Your first deadline’s tomorrow. I want to see eight thousand words. Printable words. I still remember that essay you wrote when the Beast got elected. I do not want to see the word ‘fuck’ typed eight thousand times again.”
- Royce, issue #1, Transmetropolitan » Read the rest of this entry «
#709: Vote Like a Champ in Just Six Steps
November 7th, 2016 § permalink
Voting is like improv comedy: The fact you’re unprepared is only amusing to you.
For the rest of us, those who take more than one stab at existence and who tire of any activity with a cover and two-drink minimum to watch state school theater majors laugh harder at their own jokes than the audience ever will, we like to be a little more prepared.
So in the vein of my Bare Minimum Voting Guide from the primary, a six-step plan that will get you voting like a champ in no time. * » Read the rest of this entry «
#708: Joy in Mudville
November 4th, 2016 § permalink
When I was a kid, I thought Chicago was a perpetual carnival.
It was a place where the Cubs lost and the Sox won, but I didn’t care because the Sox were pooey dumb-dumb heads who smelled like poo. And I loved the Cubs. » Read the rest of this entry «
#707: The Daily News
November 2nd, 2016 § permalink
It’s got sports on the back, a preview of Augustana College basketball’s new season.
That seems newspapery.
It’s got boring calendar items too, meeting dates for the Keep Moline Beautiful Commission and the Andalusia Township Library Board. That certainly seems like newspaper turf.
But does a newspaper purporting to print the news of Rock Island, Moline, East Moline and Milan print pieces on how Chicago Teachers Union President Karen Lewis was “refusing to honor the United States of America by standing during the national anthem.” Does the Quad Cities readership care about the seating situation of a woman who was diagnosed with cancer last year 181 miles away? » Read the rest of this entry «
#706: The Voting Dead
October 31st, 2016 § permalink
Happy Halloween. Let’s talk zombie voters. » Read the rest of this entry «
#705: Haunting Houses
October 28th, 2016 § permalink
It starts with a table of keys, two dead flowers and a rubber rat.
A few meters behind, there’s a cardboard door to a cardboard house. Crumpled butcher paper strung high to the empty warehouse ceiling simulate fog and fire, while a smoke machine pumps an acrid version of the former.
A moment later, the door opens and the real estate agent comes out, and now comes the moment I tell you this isn’t your typical haunted house.
This isn’t your typical haunted house.
Why would it be?
“I hate haunted houses,” said the woman who designed it. » Read the rest of this entry «
#704: Where I Was
October 26th, 2016 § permalink
I sipped from the little plastic cup as the bearded man with a skinny T-shirt that either advertised a band or a beer chattered on about ABVs and IBUs.
But I wanted RBIs. » Read the rest of this entry «
#703: Stunt Priest
October 24th, 2016 § permalink
The trailers were back by the AMA building. » Read the rest of this entry «
